Alex And Liam Do Walmart

My first time in America, in 1998, I visited Walmart and was as flabbergasted as these guys. There was one section where they stocked nothing but piles and piles of awful romance novels. (You know the ones with, like, a topless Fabio lookalike on the cover.) The press quote on one said: “Marks the arrival of a major new talent.”

The store was about the size of Colorado. I almost made it the entire way across before this one nagging thought got the better of me. I stopped in my tracks and turned around. Hold on, what newspaper could possibly have given that review to a trashy romance novel? I turned around and marched the entire way back.

That newspaper? The Romantic Times. God bless Walmart! God bless America!

This is funny

In honour of Comic-Con, which gets underway in San Diego today, here’s maybe the funniest ten minutes of television I’ve ever seen. “Here’s a spoiler… you will die alone.” I’m not a big fan of science fiction myself. But I have had some fun at it’s expense it in recent years…

Who will watch The Watchmen? No, seriously.
In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war.
Q&A with Pat Mills, the ‘Godfather of British comic books’

The Imelda May story: Irish media still seeking that elusive second angle

Miscellaneous amusing items I come across #57

The phrase “history is made” is so rarely used by people who have actually read history.

Miscellaneous unlikely situations I’ve found myself in #56

Full set of my own camera phone photos from South Sudan visit are here. Long feature also in the works. (Don’t rush me, I’m tired.)

Birth of a nation

On Friday midnight, South Sudan became Africa’s 55th nation. In the new capital Juba, joy was unconfined.

By 10pm, thousands of revelers had poured out onto the streets, hanging out the windows of cars, vans and pick-up trucks, waving flags and chanting slogans.

In the city’s slums, sound systems could be heard playing well into the night. Read the rest of this entry »

Published: Irish Times, 17 December 2011

The rebel priest

IN THE MUDDY SLUMS OF JUBA, the people are preparing for a party. By 11pm, tens of thousands of them have poured out onto the streets: cheering, honking car horns and waving the flag of their new country, as well as those of the US, Norway and Israel.

At the stroke of midnight, South Sudan becomes the world’s 192nd independent nation. In the new capital, joy is unconfined. In the mud huts that stretch for miles in every direction, residents can be heard singing and ululating well into the night.

By 7am, the BBC World Service is reporting a crowd of a hundred thousand already gathered at the Dr. John Garang Mausoleum. The speeches here will last late into the afternoon. But despite a complete lack of respite from the sun, the people never once cease to sing, sway and chant the names of the new state, its new president and his army.

“South Sudan… oyee!”

“Salva Kiir… oyee!”

“SPLA… oyee!” Read the rest of this entry »

Published: Irish Times, July 3 2011

A little ray of sunshine…

They say that, into each life, some rain must fall. Here in the Glasnevin Barber Shop, on a warm summer’s day, Arthur McGuinness is gleefully talking up a monsoon. The McGuinnesses have been cutting hair at this location, just opposite the National Botanic Gardens, since 1910. And mine are about to join some pretty illustrious floor sweepings.

Matt Talbot and Brendan Behan were both customers. Ditto Eamon De Valera. “He was bald on top,” recalls Arthur. “So he’d have had it very short.” The former Taoiseach’s family were also patrons. “The son was a lovely fella. Used to drive a pale blue Mercedes. He was a gynaecologist, big long fingers he had on him.” Read the rest of this entry »