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THE TOP TEN SONGS PEOPLE WROTE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE

10. I’m Satisfied With You by Hank Williams

Although barely literate, and entirely degenerate, Hank Williams remains one of the most adroit lyricists in the history of popular music. He was, after all, the man who wrote masterpieces like You Win Again and Your Cheatin’ Heart. Its probably safe, therefore, to assume that he was aware of the tightrope he was walking with the song I’m Satisfied With You. Read the rest of this article here.

THIS IS FUNNY

Just finished reading a book today called The History of Glue… Read the rest of this entry »

FOR THAT GLORIOUS ONE-TENTH OF A MILE, THE DASHBOARD SAID:

Go boobs!

I WAS BORN IN A BLIZZARD

…Or so my mother has just told me. Reckon that’s gotta be the title track on my upcoming classic rock album. “I was born in a blizzard / papa was a lizard / as we rode motorcycles cross burning bridges on a highway to hell…” Or something like that.

FAITH ALIVE

1. Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery… So should we stone you now or later, Iris Robinson?

2. This lady’s sympathies are with the axe-wielding psychopath… Read the rest of this entry »

THIS NIGHT HAS OPENED MY EYES (1983)

Listened to this song first when I was about thirteen. Still give me the same weird chill today. Read the rest of this entry »

THE MAN WHO WALKED INTO WALLS

It’s six o’clock on a Thursday evening and Hartigan’s – an old fashioned, family-run boozer on the doorstep of Stephen’s Green – is filling up with after-work drinkers. I’ve heard a few stories about this place. But this is my first time across its threshold.

With its rough-and-ready decor, bizarre zig-zag layout and curious blend of customers, Hartigan’s actually reminds me of nowhere so much (and I realise that this may be a pretty obscure reference for 99% of readers) as Julian’s of Midfield. Read the rest of this article here.

YOU’RE MESSING WITH THE WRONG COUNTRY, SLOVAKIA. MARK MY WORDS.

Just to recap. The Slovaks dupe some innocent punter into smuggling explosives into Ireland, potentially endangering, I dunno, some lives. Then they forget to mention anything about it for a few days. Now they’re insinuating that the whole imbroglio is somehow our fault. If that’s the way you want to play it, Slovakia, fine. No skin off our noses. But know this: you’ve made a powerful enemy this day.

This isn’t Iceland you’re messing. Do you even know what happens to countries who mess with Ireland? Didn’t Slovenia or someone pull you aside, try to talk some sense into you? They didn’t. Well, that’s unfortunate. Because you’re now going to suffer the consequences of Ireland’s wrath. What are we going to do about it? I’ll tell you what we’re going to do about it. Read the rest of this entry »

CHEZ MO!

After stopping off for a quick eye-opener en route, my associate and I are lucky not to lose our reservations at this delightful north inner city eatery.

Despite its’ obvious exclusivity – I am bundled in, he is shooed away – the atmosphere is refreshingly informal.

The décor is modest and unpretentious and, as I search about for a spot to hang my coat and scarf, the proprietress peppers her conversation with quips about my frequent drunkenness and occasional sexual incapacity… Read the rest of this article here.

NEW ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING (CONTD.)

I’m think Lola might be turning into one of those hipster babies you read about. Seriously. The vintage baby-grows were the first hint. Also I’ve been trying to get into Animal Collective for about eight years now to no avail. She hears them on my iPod for ten seconds and she’s nodding along and playing air sampler or whatever. Now she’s enrolled in a crèche right next door to, well, I’m not going to say which bar. But if she starts hanging out with Maser, that’s the last straw. Read the rest of this entry »